Hello, my name is Joe and I’m a squid who lives in a tank at the Field Station, bored out of my mind. Let me tell you my story:
I used to live in a creek, swimming peacefully and going wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I lived like that for years until a messenger shrimp started knocking on my Eelgrass apartment door. Uh-oh, I thought when I saw the shrimp’s scrawny little turned-out face. It was Bob, the emergency messenger, the guy who mailed the important stuff.
It was a warning that The Wild Leonard had reunited with the Wild Junior Rangers! Luckily, we had already had our armies set up: the Moon Jellies that could sting, the pinching crabs, the biting Deerflies and Mosquitos, we thought we were set. BIG mistake. When the Deerflies bit, the Wild Leonard stuck them to the Hat Of Death! Mosquitos, bug spray. Moon Jellies, simply avoid them (they don’t move so great). Crabs, shoes.
The Wild Leonard and his Wild Junior Rangers stuck, sprayed, and dodged their way over to the creek. The first one there was a Wild Junior Ranger who looked very sure of himself. At this point, I tried to hide, but he saw me first. “Hey, Lenny,” said the Wild Junior Ranger, “I want to catch that squid!”. “Sure, Raymond”, said the Wild Leonard, who had just caught up. “Go catch some squid.*Hissss*”.
To be continued (Dun dun dun…)
So, back to how I ended up in this dump of a tank; I was running away from a psychopath of a Wild Junior Ranger called (sly) Raymond(o),who was gripping a fiendish extraction device called a “net”. All of the fish neighboring my apartment were all safe inside their homes of seaweed and looking at me like, Sorry, dude. You’re on your own!
Meanwhile, the Wild Leonard and his Wild Junior Rangers were launching their plans about how they would catch me, which I didn’t notice until later. “Use poison,” a Wild Junior Ranger called Captain Mollard said. “No, no you fools!”, said the Wild Leonard. “the Evil Antibiologist Sarah wants the beast alive! I sure hope you like to seine.”.
As I swam for my life, I tried to lose Sly Raymondo by making the giant of a boy fall down. I weaved and zig-zagged around until Sly Raymondo slipped and fell flat on his face! I didn’t waste my chance. I scurried up and inked him!
“AAH! MY EYEEEEEEES!” , he said as the ink stung his face, dying it black. As I chuckled to myself, feeling rather clever, Captain Mollard and Leland the Vicious jumped out from behind the Island ‘o’ Death (a sandbar) and started lumbering after me. Hmm, they’re moving pretty slowly, I thought as I darted away, and they are splashing a ton. I realized that it was a trap one moment too late. Just before I fell in the seining net, I vaguely saw the Wild Leonard and his minion Wild Junior Ranger ‘o’Ryan Orion.
Then, I (along with a few Silversides) got pulled onto the beach where the Wild Leonard and his Wild Junior Rangers observed me cruelly until I blacked out and woke up in the horrid tank I told you about. So, yippee for me and my grand old life.